Does it happen to you that as others ask you to do something, you’re just too nice to say "no"? Have you ever wondered what makes us feel difficult to say "no"? Or what should we do to improve the situation? Lately, a questionnaire conducted by Beijing Youth Daily sheds lights on our questions related to say "no".

Among 2,001 interviewees, 54.3 percent claimed that they’re not afraid to say "no", while 14.2 percent admitted that they do feel it’s hard to do so. Psychology expert Wu Guohong from Fudan University explained that the ability to say no transforms along with the development of people’s self-consciousness. As a child grows up, whether his individuality is respected or depressed by others will affect his confidence to refuse others. Meanwhile those who are less self-determined and eager to receive recognition from others are more difficult to refuse.

At the same time, 51.8 percent of interviewees reflected that avoiding saying "no" also brings troubles to their daily life and over 70 percent expressed that they hope to learn how to say "no".

Are there any ways to help us say "no"?

Some participants suggested that instead of looking for recognition from others, it’s important to trust ourselves and put us before others, since sacrificing own benefits to meet others’ demands is meaningless. It’s also recommended to refuse others first, and then evaluate the situation again and decide whether to accept it.