Being true to herself: Transgender Ruby

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Ruby is a 21-year-old student at Suzhou University. Born with a boy’s body, she has recently undergone an operation to make her the girl she has always wanted to be.

She hopes the male-to-female surgery will end the torment that she suffered for many years. “Many of my friends called me ‘girly.' Yes, they would really say things like that.”

Fortunately, she got support from someone very important. “Finally, I was able to help my mother understand my situation. She agreed to support me in having this surgery.”

The man who performed the operation on Ruby was Dr. Zhao Yede. He’s very sympathetic to the plight of transgender people. “Because of their gender confusion, they’re afraid to do many things,” he says.

In particular, Zhao mentioned that college life can be a traumatic time for transgender people because they are too shy to make the most of what should be one of the best periods in their life. With all this in mind, he says he tends to recommend the operation.

No one is more aware of the positive impacts the surgery has on Ruby’s life than her mother. “Ruby used to not talk to anyone. Just stay in her room all day refusing to come out," she recalled.

"Even at a meal, someone might say something insulting. Ruby would just give them a silent look. Not a word to anyone.”

Like most mothers who have daughters, she hopes that Ruby will one day find a loving husband and settle down. “If she can find a good partner in the future, that’d be wonderful,” she said. "But if she can’t, it wouldn’t be the end of the world. She can just live with us.”

Ruby was a little nervous when she went out wearing a dress for the first time after the operation. /CGTN Photo

But not everyone is as understanding as Ruby’s mother.

“Some people I’ve met feel that if you’re transgender, you’re neither man nor woman.” Ruby explained, adding that her father reacted with fury when the idea of her having the operation was first mentioned to him and threatened to throw “him” out of the house.

Fortunately, most people understand Ruby's decision. Initially a little nervous about returning to university, Ruby is overwhelmed by the welcome she receives. “My relationship with most of my classmates has been wonderful. They’ve congratulated me seeing me after the operation."

Ruby has become active in the local LGBT community. Thanks to her newfound confidence, she has even appeared on stage as the leading role in a play about dealing with transgender issues. Her lines strike a chord with her own experience:

“I don’t care if I have to give my life. I wouldn’t regret it. My mom and dad, they’ve experienced much more than I have. But I can say for certain they’ve never experienced being transgender… My gender isn’t something you can decide for me. A confident, realistic person is never miserable, not to be pitied.”

Ruby, like the advancements she has benefited from, is a sign of the progress China is making on many fronts.

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